The way to Someone's Heart: altered
by Firebreather
Summary: Fixed version. Firebreather #3. FLAME US!


Any comments from the "MST-er" shall be put in ASTERISKS.  
If you are dumb enough not to know what an asterisk is yet, you are probably also a Relena fan. Okay!  
  
No corrections were made in this person's grammar.  
Now on with this girl's fic.  
  
Author Note: Hey this is my first story without Trowa/Relena pairing instead here we have a Une/Milliardo pairing! You might find a lot of these out of all my stories just like T X R! Anyway I hope you like it so please Read and Review.  
  
Firebreather's #3 note: This is a bashing to yet another fic. Again, to another FIC, not the author, we don't have anything against the author, just the FIC.  
  
  
  
The Way To Someone's Heart: *insert middle aged New Englander giving ambiguos directions to "Someone's Heart" _HERE_ *  
By: Firebreather #3  
  
  
Lady Une stood by her window looking out at the snow. She was waiting for Trowa Barton to bring her report to her. Suddenly there was a knock on the door and Trowa came in and said "I'm sorry Une the copy machine wasn't working.  
  
*Why did you need ME to deliver it, anyway??? ...And come to think of it, why in hot pants?*.  
  
She smiled and put her hand on his shoulder.  
  
*Trowa scowled and pleaded The Big Guy Way up There for this wretched meeting to end shortly*  
  
"It's okay Trowa you may go home to Relena now."  
  
He smiled *patronizing the deluded woman and thinking "THAT hermaphrodite?!NOOO!"*  
  
and gave her a hug and ran out of the office  
  
*and cursed the original author of this fic and wondered why he was so wrongly paired with a hermaphrodite like Piececrap and thought "Hmmm, Ramen might be good tonight" and glanced down at his manicured nails and thought ecchi thoughts of Quatre and...*   
  
She could see he was very excited to get home to his Relena  
  
*punchinbag. His Relena Punching bag.*  
  
she wish she had love like that  
  
*sick, vomit inducing, forced so-called love*.  
  
She heard another knock on the door and said "Please come in. *Ya filthy animal.*"  
  
in popped Milliardo Peacecraft  
  
*"Do you have the money you owe me?" asked Une. "No, no, listen, I'll get it for ya, I promise!" cried Milliardo.  
  
"I'll give ya ten seconds to get your yellowbellied carcass outta here. One, two, three, TEN!!!" she finished. She then took out a revolver and shot up Milliardo.*  
  
and he looked at a very happy Une.  
  
"Milliardo, it's been so long."  
  
*"Well, you see, I was forced to attend my sisters -cough- 'wedding' to that Barton person." He winced as he reflected painfully upon the event of a drooling troglodyte in a tacky pink wedding dress, a gagged, cuffed, unibanged bishounen; and a suffering audience, chained down to the church pews, vomitting, slowly getting cancer from the venomous odor.*  
  
she said and ran over and hugged him.  
  
*ignoring the defiant expression on his face.*  
  
"It's good to see you to Lady Une how are you?" He asked  
  
*in one breath, apparently.*  
  
She put her coat on and said  
  
*"I AM a very stylish girl!"*  
  
"Fine."  
  
Then he took her by suprise and put his arm around her waist.  
  
*"Oh, MILLIARDO! So daring!...OOoooo, I've got a naughty idea,too! Let's HUG again!"*  
  
"Dammit Une why can't I be like my *wretch* sister and her boyfriend  
  
*Wait, WHAT boyfriend??? You mean that teddy bear Heero gave her, that she keeps under her pillow and does naughty things to?*  
  
I want to be with someone too and I need to tell you that I'm really straight, and I *giggle* love you Une."  
  
She turned around to him "You do?"  
  
he smiled and straightened out her hair and kissed her lips.  
  
*Not her foot, people, not even her knee. He kissed her LIPS. Got that straight? Okay. Lips.*  
  
She was so happy she had  
  
*AN ORGASM*  
  
loved him for so long but didn't know how to tell him.  
  
He picked her up and carried her to his car  
  
*and the two made out just like back in highschool*  
  
and drove away  
  
*to Antartica*  
  
and she was so happy.  
  
  
~~~OWARI~~~  
  
  
*((People, if you hate me now, FINE!!!I did what was frickin necessary!!!))*  
  
FLAME US, DAMN you lazy BUMS!!!!!!!!  
  



End file.
